Have you ever struggled with being able to love your spouse?

During a particularly difficult day, Jesus told His followers to treat people the way they would want to be treated. “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you would want them to treat you” (Matt. 7:12). Most of us refer to this code of conduct as the “Golden Rule.”

In theory, we would probably agree that this is a good foundation for a healthy marriage relationship. Yet it’s tough to live up to such a standard. If we made a list of the ways we hope our spouse would treat us and compared it with our own behavior, we would likely fall short.

And of course, it’s easy to love our spouse when they are treating us well. But how do we respond when their behavior is hurtful or unpleasant? The truth is, Jesus meant for us to love our spouse
all the time, not just when they are lovable. Regardless of their attitude toward us, we are to think about the relationship qualities we value-like loyalty, trust, encouragement, forgiveness and acceptance and let these flow from us in our spouses direction.

Unfortunately, our society encourages selfishness, greed, and pride, which are enemies of the unconditional love Jesus commanded. But when we care for our spouse in this way, relationships will deepen and thrive .

Deciding each day to treat your spouse with this kind of love isn’t natural or easy, especially when they are being unkind. In fact, loving as Jesus commanded is impossible-on our own. But when we trust Christ as Savior, the Holy Spirit empowers us and lives His life through us (Gal. 2:20) therefore allowing us to be able to truly demonstrate our love for our spouse.

Application

Take a few minutes to list the ways that you hope your spouse would treat you.  Then ask yourself, Is that how I treat my spouse?  Pray for God to reveal one area where He will help you to apply the Golden Rule. It will go a long way in improving your marriage.